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The Lighter Side of Lycanthropy

You are brought out of your howling by the sound of small children singing. You prick up your ears and listen. The lyrics are hard to make out, but they have something to do with taking responsibility for one's actions and being kind to others. You realize the irregularity of this.

Feeling inspired, you flex your paw several times, faster and faster. The third time, it does not move according to the laws of physics; it goes from one position to a very different one without any transition. Excited, you jump around the room, trying to gain perspective. Just as you suspected, everything that at first seemed three-dimensional is only two-dimensional.

You are not a real werewolf, after all, but a cartoon werewolf! Moreover, the cartoon appears to be from the 1970s. Relieved at not having to kill anyone, you grab a baseball cap and put it on sideways. If you are going to be a werewolf on television, you want to be hipper than your competition. Now, all you need is a sidekick. You wonder if the doctor has a young understudy.


Written by Joey Liverwurst (edited by phaedrus)

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