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Santa Explains

While your eating, the santa dude comes up to you and starts talking to you like he's been your friend since 2nd grade.

"Well, your going to be the new santa." He said casually.

You muffle somthing between mouthfulls that sounds closely to 'why?.' Santa seems to understand.

"Well, i'm getting old, and I need a replacement."

You again muffle somthing out. "But dosent Santa live forever?"

"Oh no, there have been plenty of santas in this world. All of them have grown old, then found a replacement. You see," he starts. "It dosen't matter how old the 'santa' is. When a new santa comes, magic will do it's work and make everybody think that santa was always portrayed as a young guy. The only thing that changes is thier weight. The first santa was a big guy. And the only pair of santa clothes are the ones i'm wearing. So all santas have to be fat."

"How fat do they get?" (your still eating, so it sounds muffeled.)

"Well, 290lbs. Oh, and you'll have to grow a beard.

He talks more, and your thinking about becoming the new santa. When he finishes explaining, you decide to tell him (ok, or to get someone else?


Written by santas home boy

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